Wednesday, February 11, 2009

The Five Love Languages

Well....I haven't had too eventful of a week which is why I haven't blogged. Nothing to blog about. I'm waking up early tomorrow and driving down to Memphis to see my hubby!! Both of us got our Valentine's shopping done today. It's slightly odd since we share a bank account now. We're like 'don't do any online banking so you won't see where I got your gift from.' My gift for Scott isn't super special. I got him a couple of little things but they're nice and I think he'll like them. I just couldn't think of anything fantastic! He said the best gift I could get him was no gift at all. Typical coming from a financial analyst and over the top saver. I just could never NOT get him a gift. After reading my honeymoon beach read, The 5 Love Languages, I discovered that my love language is gift giving. You tend to do your own love language for your spouse so even though that's not his love language, I feel like I would be a bad wife if I didn't get him something!!
Maybe I should explain this book a bit. I TOTALLY recommend this book to EVERYONE. I'm so glad my brother got this book for Scott and I to read. The author is Gary Chapman. He's written many books like this. He's a psychologist and has discovered that people speak a certain love language. The 5 love languages are: Quality Time, Words of Affirmation, Gift Giving, Acts of Service, and Physical Touch. Everyone has their own love language. So for example, my love language is gift giving. That means that when Scott gives me a gift, weather it be a surprise coke from Sonic, or a diamond ring, that's when I feel the most loved by him. His love language is quality time. So he feels most loved by me when I spend time with him. Weather is sitting on the couch together watching TV or going on a long vacation. The book has a test in the back for the couple to take so you can figure out your love language. Even though you pretty much can figure it out half-way through the book what your love language is. Most people have a 2nd love language that comes very close to your main love language and it's equally important. I feel like my 2nd love language is typical for a woman and Scott's 2nd is typical for a man. My 2nd love language that scored very close to my primary love language is acts of service. Meaning if Scott does the dishes and vacuums the floor I really feel loved. His 2nd love language is physical touch. Duh. No explanation needed.
The psychologist explains that many couples have marital problems because they don't know their spouses love language. The husband may send his wife flowers but she really wants him to do the laundry. Or the wife may give her husband physical touch when he really needs some words of affirmation. It's such a great book and I think it can totally save a marriage. While we were in St. Lucia, we saw a couple get married on the beach. We saw them many times after that and since my brother gave Scott and I two copies of the book, I decided to give my copy to the newly married couple. Hopefully they'll read it and it will make their marriage really strong.
So like I said earlier, you tend to do your love language for your spouse. I love leaving Scott little notes and buying him gifts. He thinks if I snuggle on the couch with him and if he gives me hugs and kisses I feel really loved. I'm like, nah! Just buy me something!! Haha. Scott was like, OF COURSE yours is gift giving. I'm like well, hello! I have to deal with you sucking my face off all the time so get over it! Just kidding babe :)
Scott told me today he had to make extra sure his gift was a good one since that's my love language. Awww. I'm like that too though with him...
So yeah, the book was great. It's a really easy read. It took us about 3 days to finish. I think it's a great book and would make a great Valentine gift too!!
So there you go. I had no idea when I started this blog that I would write about The Five Love Languages the whole time but I'm glad I did. Hopefully it'll help some readers out!

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